7/16/07
I just know all the good and bad ways I've tried to make my life work with him, I give up after two children and all these years of trying. Once baby comes, I have to live life-find a job, buy a car, explore life outside of motherhood, and convince myself that moving on is okay for me.
11/11/07
I know this. I knew and still know that with all the help I'm getting, all I have is me. My sister wrote me something poignant: Believe in yourself and you have all the answers to the questions.
But even though I know this and I pretty much live by it everyday, it all just doesn't seem fair. Really, I long for companionship with him, and with all the many happy moments my children show me daily, there is something unsettling that I feel because the person who is supposed to share those moments with me, isn't here.
2/27/08
I have always loved him.
It's just too late this time, I think. Of course I'm sad about not fixing my family, but I can't live this way. I don't need all this stress.
All I really want is happiness.
* * *
Read Christie Cooke's previous Native Moms blog, "My Decision to Breastfeed"
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Comments?

Single family or not...
Families are viewed by some to require a father and mother in order to be accepted by a society. But there are situation when maybe a father or mother are not the best influence to the chilren. Parents have one chance to make a child's life filled with happiness or drowned with unhappiness. A young innocent mind learning from what the mother or father do is something that needs constance monitoring. Parents in a rocky relationship need to put their feelings for each other aside and think about the child(ren) they are entertaining with their "soap opera" arguments. They need to think about what they are teaching the children. There is nothing wrong for a parent willing to take the challenge of raising their child(ren) alone for the sole purpose of saving their young eyes and ears of a sobbing parent, door slams, loud red faced person shouting words like "I hate you!", "Get out of here!", "You don't love me!", "You bitch!", "You a**hole!". I took the challenge and never regret leaving the other parent...never! Just thought I share my views about single parent situations.
Just YOU
All you need is just you and when you least expect it you will find happiness....with you, with someone else who is all you have ever wanted.....but know that you can do anything Chris.....and I know that everything for you is going to work out!
Autumn
yes indeed chris, all you
yes indeed chris, all you need is happiness no matter what. if your happy, i am happy. i love you lots and respect what you will choose to do. i love you!
mahin
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